Evening Personalities Target Trump's Controversial 'Gold Card' Visa Scheme

Late-night's prominent hosts used their evening mocking ex-President Donald Trump's recently unveiled immigration initiative, dubbed the "golden visa," describing it as a blatant pay-for-access arrangement for the affluent.

The Late Show's Sarcastic Spin

Opening his program, Stephen Colbert delivered a satirical Christmas song about the president. "He is making a list, reviewing it twice, then giving that list to the agents at ICE," he crooned. "The President ... spoils all he comes into contact with."

The subject was the controversial initiative which allows foreign nationals to purchase U.S. residence for a sum of a million dollars, or "platinum" version for five million. The program's website pledges approval "faster than ever."

"One thought here to rich foreigners: prior to you fork over the cash, have you considered Canada?" Colbert remarked.

He noted that the scheme is also designed to "squeeze cash" from companies wishing to hire skilled workers, requiring large fees. "That's a lot of fees, though if you sign up, you also get a complimentary stay at a property of your choosing – if it's the that one hotel," he added.

"The best vetting the U.S. government has ever done," stated Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to ensure these individuals absolutely qualify to be in America."

"That is important, you have to prove you're suitable to be an American," Colbert deadpanned. "First question: how many burgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Humorous Critique

On his own show, Jimmy Kimmel referred to the visa program the "American Dream Express Card."

"Here's a card that will permit wealthy international individuals to live here," he stated. "In exchange for a million bucks, you get official resident status, you get a road to citizenship, and a presidential pardon for one major crime of your choosing."

"Maybe it's time to change that message on the Statue of Liberty – to hell with your tired masses. Hand over a million bucks, you're in!" he joked.

Kimmel lampooned the brevity of the form, saying it is "more difficult to start a Wordle account." He lamented that Trump "believes citizenship is something you can sell, like a steak."

"Exactly, the best people are the rich people," Kimmel said. "It's what Jesus constantly said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's simpler for a camel to go through the eye of a needle provided that you pay the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers on Economic Concerns

Meanwhile, Seth Meyers turned to Trump's slipping poll numbers amid financial anxiety. "Voters gave Donald Trump a second term because they were mad about the economy," he said.

This week, in a bid to tackle prices, Trump conducted a briefing in front of a display of grocery items, and behaved strangely to some cereal.

"What a nice job, I think I'm going to take some of them back to my home and have a lot of fun," Trump remarked. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a while."

"He is so extremely weird," Meyers responded. "What do you mean, you're going to take them back to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What exactly happens with those Cheerios?"

Meyers finished by criticizing conservative news arguments of Trump's economic record. "Perhaps instead of complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy similar to what FIFA did," he remarked.