One day at work two years ago, an notification hit on my mobile device: my paycheck had been deposited. It was a fair amount for a student, so I did my usual payday ritual: I opened every single retail application on my phone. From Amazon to Zara, the list was endless. In under 60 minutes, I had parted with £90 on clothes, home decor and a totally useless heavy blanket that I never used.
A few days later, I returned to the internet and bought a hairdryer. I already owned one, but thought an extra one wouldn't be a problem. Then I included LED strip lights and two pairs of shoes that weren’t even my size. This wasn't a new pattern. In fact, I’d been infamous for it since I started earning.
Whenever I felt stressed, tired or bored, I would mindlessly scroll until it inevitably culminated in an impulsive shopping binge. My justification was constantly: “Oh well, it’s just £5.” But £5 became £10, then £20, and so on.
I was never completely certain about the reason. Maybe it was because my upbringing in a poor family, where we’d experience months without buying new clothes or anything to brighten up the home. So any time I had extra money, there was always a subconscious yearning for novel and thrilling things. Or maybe, and almost certainly, I was just financially irresponsible and gave in readily to capitalism’s consumerism.
Eventually, I decided to try something new. Before acquiring any item, I’d place it in my basket, delay for 24 hours, then make a choice on whether to finalize the purchase. The best part of this technique was that it gave me time to reflect – something I’d never taken. For the first time since I turned 18, I began asking myself: “Do I truly need this? Is it within my budget?” Most of the time, the response was no.
If I accessed my shopping apps and found products lingering in my basket, I’d clear them out and start fresh. By employing this method, I ceased acquiring goods that I knew deep down I would never use. I once considered purchasing a trio of games, but after a waiting period before going to the shop, I understood I never actually engage with board games.
I also contemplated buying a single-use camera for my first holiday to the coast. After waiting I remembered I possessed a phone, similar to most people, that features a perfectly adequate lens, and therefore had no requirement to acquire a dedicated camera.
It also signifies I am more selective about the items I do buy, and I can at last review my bank statements devoid of experiencing shame or embarrassment.
Naturally, there have been occasions I’ve relapsed into old patterns – it’s only natural. The difference now is that I can recognise the signs sooner, especially when I’m hastening into a transaction. I’ve realised ennui is a powerful trigger. It’s probably the primary driver of my impulsive spending.
Modern culture exploits this idleness and our desire for instant gratification. That’s the reason, looking back, forcing myself to pause before purchasing has felt strangely freeing. To be able to have control over my impulses and remind myself that I don't have to expend my diligently earned money on non-essential goods feels as revolutionary as it is straightforward.
Film critic and industry analyst with a passion for uncovering cinematic trends and storytelling techniques.
